Thursday, June 19, 2014

40 Weeks ... and Still Waiting

Today marks our due date... and still no baby, womp womp. Went to the doctor today and while it looks like we're getting close to go time they went ahead and scheduled for me to be induced on 6/25. I sure hope she decides to come out on her own! While I understand the concerns of letting us go far past our due date, I am more concerned with artificially starting a natural process and its possible complications. So please please please baby girl let's get things moving before they make you!

Today also marks the fifth (week) day that I have been off work. I am happy I made the decision when I did as I've become increasingly uncomfortable, tired and sore so I'm pretty sure I would've been miserable unnecessarily. Everyone was loving the "aren't you so excited to be done with work" question. Surprisingly my answer is no. I'm beyond excited for our daughter to be born but leaving work felt strange. It's all I've ever done - worked and worked hard. So to leave work for an undefined amount of time is an unknown and therefore a little frightening for me.

At first I felt like I was playing hookey, that I had called in sick but wasn't and had some guilt that I was home sitting on the couch. Now that feeling is gone but I sure do feel lost. I just don't have anything to do. Going from running around daily at 100 miles an hour to waking up wondering how I'm going to fill another day is a strange transition. My physical activity is obviously very limited so it's not like I can be out there doing all the hiking and playing around that I would love to be able to do. I get worn out after 30 minutes just trying to get groceries. So I'm trying to focus on relaxing as much as possible and enjoy the quiet while I can because, yes, I've heard it a million times now, it's about to go away in a big way. I know I'll feel very different once she's here but for now in this waiting game I'm feeling lost.

The recent heat wave is not helping my case. I would love to be sitting out at a park reading but I melt just getting in the car. I've always been sensitive to heat/humidity but being pregnant takes it to a whole new level. Nate has always been a furnace compared to me but even just last night he was shivering under the covers while I was barely cooled off enough without any covers. Don't even want to look at our electric bill this month!

So here's hoping little miss decides to make her debut before the 25th so we can have as natural of an experience as possible! And so my sanity can start to come back...




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